Confessions of a Mirror
by Riku's Rose
Summary: The night before Operation Mi'ihen, Gippal sheds his mask and realizes a bit of cold truth. In the middle of a war, love is not an option nor will it save him from a gunshot wound. Yaoi.


_An on-going Gippalai I've been working on since I got the game._

_Me owning FF-X-2 is not a possibility, nor will I ever claim rights. Notes at the bottom._

**Confessions of a Mirror**

**Prologue**

He was always the one. The person to go to when you were sad, or lonely, maybe a combination of the two. He was there and Gippal relied on him for that sole purpose. Baralai was the important "best friend" role in his life. A world where he didn't exist was simply ludicrous.

Although, Gippal wasn't sure about his actor in Baralai's little play and often wondered late at night when the other man was curled by his side as always, just like now. He liked the idea of being someone important, someone to make Baralai happy. He wished he was, but that's all it was. A wish.

Baralai would go on to do better things, things he wasn't afraid of or would feel incredibly guilty for later. Things that wouldn't haunt him. He was far too important for a future not up to him, and Gippal would do anything to give him whatever he wished.

Why? Well, Gippal decided he was just that kind of person and...

He hated himself.

Catching the moon out of the corner of his eye, Gippal watched as it shadowed itself behind dark clouds, obscuring further view. He smiled just slightly, observing as the pale light illuminated Baralai's soft white hair and then consume his face gradually as well.

"Muja sa tayn, muja sa huf, palyica E'mm pa kuha fedr dra cunnuf uv fyn." Gippal whispered to the night, chest clenching with foreign anxiety that he knew he could get rid of. 1

Tomorrow was Operation Mi'ihen.

Gippal used to be excited, thrilled, even going as far as counting down the seconds for a battle but now, he had other priorities to deal with, people to... to worry about. When did he worry? The word was new, and it wasn't a good thing by far, especially with his personality.

But Baralai was someone to worry about. Wise but too trusting, naive and at times much too caring. In a war, you fight first and regret later. Casualties were a reality and sheltering Baralai would do nothing but lead him to an early death because desperate men prey on sympathy.

There was absolutely no room for mistake.

Gippal knew this, and so did Baralai. They'd both been informed and trained. Knowledge of what was expected never left Gippal's mind, even in the worst situation. Be ready for anything, he understood that completely.

A nudge knocked him out of his dark thoughts. Looking down into sleep induced chocolate eyes, he knew them perhaps better than his own.

"Gippal, you should sleep. It's so late."

Shrugging sheepishly and pulling on an easy to look through grin, Gippal watched Baralai yawn slightly and then blush as a silent apology as if he did something most unapproving.

"Ah, I'll be okay. Sleep isn't really _that_ important for someone like me." It was an easy lie to see through, but one that was filled with hidden subtext waiting to be deciphered, as usual with their conversations.

Gippal felt the small pressure of a hand clasping around his arm, gentle and assuring. Baralai had sat up now, leaning slightly against him for support. "Sleep is very much important, whether it's you or not, Gippal." His voice held concern and worry which did nothing but make Gippal ashamed. He shouldn't put Baralai through his problems when he knew the other couldn't function properly without sleep.

He smiled softly, reaching and catching Baralai's hand in his, tangling their fingers together and noting the contrast of his light skin against Baralai's tanned. "Don't worry about me, Lai. I'll sleep 'n stuff, just, there's a lot on my mind right now."

Baralai nodded, but the worry on his face didn't vanish. He clenched their intertwined hands tightly. "I...understand. There's questions and doubt on mine as well, but still..."

"I'll be fine. We Al Bhed can spend weeks without sleep on a machina and never lose focus. So, if I skip a couple hours here and there, won't kill me. Now do I have to knock you out or will you go peacefully?"

Baralai smiled, breaking their link with a stretch and curled up, snuggling deep into Gippal's side. "Well, if you say so... I'll trust you. Good night Gippal."

Gippal was fighting with himself to just _tell _Baralai right there and face the outcome...but a part of him knew either two things would happen. Baralai would cry and confess his own feelings in a whirlwind of emotions and it would definitely not be good for tomorrow or Baralai would be indecisive about a relationship and worry himself the rest of the night and so on which would cause distraction tomorrow...

They were both in love with each other, but neither would act for different reasons. Gippal didn't fear rejection because he already knew Baralai's feelings. He was simple to read with romance, and the old flirting was a definite filler.

He would wait though. Wait as long as he had to and then sweep Baralai off his feet like he properly deserved. Girls were nice, especially in certain areas but he knew when he met Baralai for the first time, there was something there that he'd never experienced in anyone.

"Fa'mm pa dukadran Baralai. D...dussunu famm lusa yht ku." 2

Gippal swallowed, nearly laughing at how butter and solemn his words actually sounded. It was as if he was trying to convince himself. He glanced down at the sleeping figure by his side, smiling when an errant strand of white hair fell into closed eyes. After struggling mentally, Gippal gave into the urge to push it away, finally grinning slyly to himself.

No worries. He was finished thinking.

End of prologue or maybe it could stand alone if I get bored. This is before Operation Mi'ihen, obviously. I thought I'd take a different rout than them secretly liking each other and not knowing about the other. It's yaoi, might I add so no flames about that.

1 Love me dear, love me now, because I'll be gone tomorrow with the sorrow of war.

2 We'll be together Baralai, t...tomorrorw will come and go.


End file.
